HOLIDAY SUPRISES

The holiday season can be filled with many warmhearted memories as families gather with their loved ones to celebrate the season. As family members travel near and far returning home to their loved ones they may find the familiar household that was once kept meticulously clean and orderly, in disarray and dirty. They may notice unopened mail stacked on the table, moldy food in the refrigerator, or their loved one's personal hygiene declining.
As people age or become ill, there are some considerations and competencies that family members should assess, to determine if it might be appropriate to take a more active role in a loved one's life. Most people that face health-related challenges or limitations will not ask for help, as they tend to place a high value on their privacy and independence. Most people do not want to be a burden on their family and friends.

Regardless of whether a health-related concern is due to aging, illness, injury or incapacity, the fact remains, an overwhelming majority of people simply do not know when to take a more active role in a loved one's life. The following is a list of 10 areas for family members to review if they have concerns about their loved one's ability to care for themselves:

MEDICAL CONCERNS - Has your loved one been diagnosed with a disease, illness or injury that could impact their daily living? How will this life changing concern affect their quality of life?

DRIVING - Is your loved one's driving habits placing them at risk? Are there any unexplained dents and paint scratches on their vehicle? How are their reflexes, vision and ability to respond in an unexpected situation?

FOOD / NUTRITION - Are they eating a healthy, balanced meal? Has there been a noticeable weight loss? Can they manage their grocery shopping? Is the food in the refrigerator consumable?

HYGIENE - Is there a noticeable smell or body odor? How is their overall appearance, grooming and ability to match clothing?

BEHAVIOR - Does your loved one seem anxious or irritable? Do they seem depressed, or uncomfortable away from home? Is there a memory loss concern?

DAILY TASKS - How do they handle daily tasks such as household duties, cleaning, cooking, laundry?

MEDICATIONS - Are they able to manage their own medications including dosage, frequency and prescription changes? Do they understand why they are taking certain medications?

FINANCES - Have there been additional late payment fees, cancellation notices, or bills left unpaid? Can they manage and reconcile their checkbooks?

MAIL - Is the mail stacking up? Does it appear that they are being targeted for solicitation offers?

SAFETY - Do they keep doors and windows locked? Are they careful with items such as candles and cigarettes? Are they in need of assistive devices such as, a shower chair, a toilet riser, or grab handles in the bathroom?

If you have concerns, talk with, not to, your loved one in a casual and non-threatening way. Conversations should reflect a sincere concern for their welfare and a willingness to work together. Let them know that you respect their desire for independence, yet want them to enjoy a meaningful life without being at risk.